March 25, 2020

Marshawn Didn't Get the Ball & Everything Has Sucked Since

I’ll never forget Super Bowl XLIX. That’s the one where Russell Wilson threw an interception at the goal line, which lost the game for my Seahawks. Everybody feels like Marshawn Lynch should have been given the ball then.

Just the other day I heard a theory that the decision to not give Marshawn the ball threw the Earth off its axis. Since that decision in 2015, many bad things have happened, such as:

  • Brexit
  • Trump
  • Australian Wildfires
  • Covid-19

This is all Pete Carroll’s fault.